Thursday, March 31, 2011

Date? What date?

So I was supposed to have a date. My first date with a stranger since I met my almost-ex years ago. I promised a story, and I was looking forward to a story but I have none. Why you ask? Because it never happened. Lol

Here's the long, short version of it. Maybe someone can tell me if this is normal and if this is what I should expect. Lol

First the day before I sent a text confirming (I'm type A I confirm, deal with it :)). Basically 10 hours later he gets back to me, "Ya sure, what time we'd say again? 7pm?". Wow can this guy contain his excitement anymore! I replied we said 4:30 as per his request, we agree to move it to 7. Done, and off to bed I go.

I wake up in the morning and start taking bets. The day is divided into 2 hours windows until 4pm and they can bet when he will cancel. We hit 3:45, ding! I have a text. He's asking to postpone till the next day, cause he has to work till 7. I can't stop laughing. I say no, text me when you're done work and if I'm up for it we can meet then. When he does finally text (almost 8:30) I'm on my way to meet friends. He's willing to wait up, I say its fine and we resched for the next day. Same time, same place. Done, and off to bed I go.

Get up in the am and don't feel the need to take any bets (which I won by the way). Cause seriously this would be the third time he'd cancel and no-one can be that flaky. Ha, ha. I'm funny. Day goes by without a hitch. 3:30 pm Bing! I have a text. He's just been called for a job gotta go can we meet up later when he's done. I ask him to "define later". His reply 12ish, maybe later. Huh?!? What? Doesn't he know that its a "school" night. Who meets for a drink at midnight?

Bing! Light bulb! He's not thinking drinks, did I seriously just get booty called by someone who hasn't even met me? Now I can't stop laughing! The tears are flowing! On one hand, flattering on the other wft! I reply with no, obviously it wasn't meant to be and good luck with everything. Done, and home I go.

Needless to say, I have heard nothing more.

So that is one of the Internet guys down. Lets see if the other one is any better, seriously I only think we can go up from here. But, who knows I've been surprised before. Lol

I'm really glad I closed my account before I accepted more dates than these two. Lol.

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Impulsive or Genius?

I can be a rather impulsive person on occasion. I can also agonize about things as well. Really it depends on my mood, the alignment of planets, the tides and maybe what I had for lunch.

In November, in what I thought was the muck of my life (ha, ha says fate you were wrong). I got a tattoo.

Now I've always wanted one but just been to chicken to get one. So that day I was attending meetings off site and close to my house. My meetings finished early. However, it was useless to go to the office because I'd have to leave pretty quick after I arrived to go pick up my son at my in laws. However, I was way too early to pick him up from my in laws so I had a couple hours to kill. I started to wonder. I wondered my ass right into a tattoo parlor. Asked about a phrase that had popped onto my head a few days earlier. Guy told me it'd be $80.00." Thank you very much I'll call you"

Apparently by "calling you" I meant walk out the door, turn around, and walk back in and get it done. Poor guy spent 45 minutes with me trying to figure out a font for my 3 words. 45 MIN! He copies it onto the transfer paper and is just about to put it on my wrist when.. "STOP!! Wait, can we use this instead?" I can only imagine what's going through this guys head as I hand him the original piece of paper that I used to write out my 3 words on almost an hour ago.

He was wonderful and amazing and used my words in my writing and took less that 10 minutes to tattoo my phrase on my wrist.

So I ask, impulsive? Yes. But also genius... my gut knew what I needed that day and I'll tell you I have no regrets. My inner left wrist is a constant reminder of things I lost once and will hold on to for the rest of my life as hard as possible. Also the phrase is what I want my son to know me as, to live life as, to strive to always achieve.

Now I have one, I realized not only did I get it to remind myself never to lose those things again, but also  to regain myself. I gave up alot over the last few years of who I was and I'm slowly getting it back. I just put all my earrings back in and also put my tongue stud back too (my soon-to-be-ex hated my piercings and never returned my jewelry after labour). These things are superficial but they were part of who I was for years prior to my relationship. It's fun rediscovering yourself.

What are my 3 words, the 3 words that I hold so close to me that they are now tattoo over a major artery.

Thank you pottery barn :)

Sunday, March 27, 2011

They're back!!

So before I met and married my almost-ex I had 4 holes in each ear, a belly button ring and a tongue stud.

My fav was the tongue stud. I got it when i was 19, it was really the first thing I truly did for myself, not caring what anyone thought. Especially my parents. Yes, it was my little rebellion.

I had that baby for 10 years. Then at 29 I gave birth. Going into the hospital I had to take out all my jewellery including my stud. I handed them to my husband expecting them to be returned post delivery. Silly me, thinking he would actually do it. See he hated my piercings. So 4 days later when I was coming out of my post delivery, new baby, no sleep daze I remember. He never gave me back my stud! By now it was too late as it had already grown in, so I ask him why he didn't give me back my jewelry. "I was hoping you'd forget about them". So I lost my favorite piercing, something that I was proud of, that was a part of me simply because my ex didn't like it, looking back it was not his decision to make. I have always missed it. Two years later I still go to play with the ghost of the stud, always disappointed that its not there.

Sat night I decided, screw it. Who cares if I'm 31, a mom, wear a suit to work (all reasons my ex had put into my head). I'm getting it back. So I packed up my son, called my friend and off the 3 of us went at 6 pm to get mommy some new jewelry. We went to the only place I could think of close to my house. My friend waits outside with my son because I don't know how I feel about taking him into a tattoo parlor. They were about to close but he still agreed to do it for me :) Yay! I'm a little excited now. My friend was going to take my son for a walk but he has to go pee so inside the store I take him. What a wonderful bunch of guys! They all say hi, pay attention to him, and even get him paper and pencils so he can sit up and draw at the desk with one of the artists just like he was! It was awesome.

Now it's my turn. Have I mentioned I hate needles, yes I know then why the hell am I doing this, again? Well because it was a part of me,  a part I didn't make the choice to give up. So here I am lying on the table as this guy is about to stick a needle and barbell through my tongue. I start to hum (I always hum when I'm nervous or when needles are involved, I hummed the entire time I got my tattoo too). He giggles at me then "whoop" all done! That's it, 30 seconds later and we're finished. I go out front and my son and friend are sitting playing with random Lego men and things the guys could find for him. He's in heaven!

Now here I am happy and feeling more like myself than I have in years. It's really funny how something so small and insignificant seems to be tied into my finally feeling a little more like me and less like the wife I had become.

Saturday, March 26, 2011

A Date?

So I have a date, actually maybe two.

Turns out internet dating wasn't quite ready to let me go. I talked to a total of 4 people that I didn't already know. Three of them asked me out. One is never going to happen, the other cancelled last minute and the third well that ones still up in the air. I go to close my account and one guy asked me out basically the same day, my friends have convinced me to get the hell out of my house and get some adult time on one of the two nights my son is with his dad. So I figure why not break every rule I have and send this guy my number while telling him that I'm cancelling my account. Almost the next day a guy I was supposed to meet with a few weeks back emails me (we hadn't gotten to the phone number exchange part... I'm slow). We chatted abit on MSN and now we're meeting for a drink (well dinner bc I'll be starving and seriously who doesn't eat.... mmm food).

Here's my thing, or things plural because there are more than one. I'm only going to get out, maybe have some interesting conversation, do something other than crochet (yes I crochet... I'll post some goodies eventually) and work when I don't have the monkey. Problem is I haven't been on a date with a stranger in a very long time, 4 maybe 5 years. Is it like riding a bike? Or will I be rusty and need some WD40 (wait maybe that's why you just drink no food it's like dating WD40... grease the wheels). I'm not scared of it being horrible, or me making a fool of myself (I do that basically daily anyways) I can't deiced if I'm more scared of going out, having fun and not missing my friend (because it means I'm past what was/could have been great) or going out and turning into a total wreck because I'll miss him more. Kinda feel like it could go either way, flip a coin woman and decide!

Guess we'll find out. To be honest I have a feeling the first guy will be a story either way, he seems to just have a story worthy personality. lol. But, hell what isn't a story in my life.

Friday, March 25, 2011

The shoe update, as promised

Shoes. I love shoes, especially heels!!!

I love my heels, don't get me wrong I love my red Chuck Taylors just as much but a great unique pair of heels you can't beat!

Again from there is a brand called Iron Fist. I can't even pick. Now Iron Fist is not the only brand they carry. These are just one of my favs, the ones I"m possibly planning on purchasing next but there are many more great styles!

And they GLOW!!! (not my legs unfortunatly)

Check em out, and as usual I love suggestions if you know of any other shoes I should check out!

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Internet Dating... a follow up

So previously I mentioned how internet dating and I are not friends. I thought this required a follow-up.

For all of you who are wondering, we are still not friends. So much so that I requested to terminate our relationship. I figured it would be best for both of us if we went our separate ways. He was upset (because I now refer to the entire website as an him), and I know it's because I'm so awesome! But I wasn't doing either of us any favors. I wasn't interested in anyone he brought me, anyone he paraded across my computer screen. I rarely replied to messages. At one point I told a guy I'm much better in person, I grow on people to which he compared me to herpes! HERPES!

It seemed if I wasn't desperately searching for a life partner or for a one night stand then it wasn't for me. Don't get me wrong there are a tonne of nice people on there, normal people and I know a few people who have met wonderful people on dating sites. However right now it's not my cup of tea and I don't have the patience or the time to wade through to find my right one.

So we sat down and I told him "it's not you, it's me". He cried, there was a little tear. I told him I may be back but not to wait for me. I'm going to sit the next little while out. Date myself for a while.

Saturday, March 12, 2011

Eat Pray Love

Ok so here is the first book I've completed in the last while (other than the twilight series... no judgement please. lol)

I have now read the book and watched the movie. The movie is a good watch though don't expect anything profound, it's your regular hollywood entertainment.

The book however is another story. It took me forever to get through because she rambles... ALOT. That being said though she makes some very valid points. So much so that I ripped two pages out to carry with me.. TWO whole pages. And for me this is a huge deal. A little part of me cried as I tore out page one, I will mark up my books, write notes in them, but never, NEVER rip one out. If a cover gets torn I get upset and here I am ripping actual pages out.

Over all I highly recommend the book for anyone going through a breakup or divorce but I strongly believe that everyone will take different things out of it. Be forewarned though if you are not into great detailed explanation of the history of places or things be prepared to skim a lot of the book. But buried in all the detail and description are some great insights. I personally walked away with a new perspective on a soul mate as well as kind of a definition of how I perceive my partners.

For those of you that have read the book (not the movie because I personally didn't receive anything from the movie) I'd be interested in knowing what you got out of it, as well any suggestions on what I should read next?

Friday, March 11, 2011

Murphys Law and...

Murphy and Fate, the great wish granter, like to play games with me.

So much so that it's become almost comical, my life that is.

One day I wished to run into my friend just to see him, see how he's doing. That day we ran into each other 5 times, at least. You could say that fate listened and said "here you go baby". Not what I was hoping for, once maybe twice, just a quick walk by. But Fate did grant my wish, in full force just not in the way I wanted. It's like when I buy a lottery ticket, Fate grants my wish, I won a free ticket! Not exactly what I was hoping for (50 million would have been a little more help).

Murphy steps in when Fate is on vacation. After seeing him 5 times I need a breather. So Murphy steps in and decides that I now have to retrain most of my staff one by one at a location that is right beside where he is working. This wouldn't seem to be such a big deal except that this location requires security clearance and the only reason myself or my staff are there are to get to this room specifically. This week of all weeks (one of the only 2 he is working in that area) I find out that no one is checking this room and they need to be retrained immediately. Meaning one by one I have to parade my staff right by his site to the room almost directly beside it. Could I have put it off for a week? Possibly but there are so many projects on the go I need to do things as they come up or they never get done.

So is it just me? Do Fate and Murphy have it out for me or does this happen to everyone?

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

The Search for the Impossible, New Clothes!

So I'm on a hunt for great clothes and even better shoes. With all the options out there it should be a simple task right?


My taste in clothing and shoes has always been slightly different. Not bad just different, ever so slightly (ha, ha I'm hilarious!). I used to have some great pieces and a wonderful collection of shoes. However, during the last few years it's dwindled. Now I'm left with very little and I'm hoping to expand my wardrobe.

I'm slowly finding bits and pieces here and there and I just have to share one website, specifically two brands from the site that I am now obsessed with! Heartbreaker (a dress of theirs is pictured) and Iron Fist shoes (to be posted later). These are not the only things I love from this site but they are for sure at the top of my purchase list!

The site is absolutely amazing!!!

My new dress... no it's not me in the picture.

Check it out!!! If you have any other suggestions to look for new clothes I'd love to hear them!!! I love finding new stuff!!!